I'm Not Perfect
When I started this blog, I intended it to be a space where I could safely document my health journey. I wanted to be honest about my eating disorders and offer support to people struggling with their health and their weight, as I do.
As the months passed, I found myself trying to be perfect. And putting a lot of stress on myself when I wasn't. I wanted to skip the journey and get to the final destination. I wanted to pretend like I was not overeating. I wanted to make it seem like I had so much willpower that I was happily eating kale salads and collard green burritos without dreaming about pizza and pasta. If I sat here and acted as if that were true, I would be lying to you.
I went raw for a few weeks in hopes it would kick the cravings and rid me of my acid reflux problems. It defiantly helped my indigestion, but a week after allowing myself something other than green smoothies and raw crackers, I binged on bagels and sushi. So there you have it. I still struggle, and I am putting it out there for everyone to see.
I am not perfect. I am not over my stress eating. And I am still in the process of figuring it out. I still want to eat a mainly raw diet, and I believe I can get there, but I am defiantly struggling in the process. And I hope my honesty will make you realize that if you are going through the same thing, you are not alone.
Emotional eating is something that runs deep and is very hard to overcome. I have heard that something called EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) works but I have yet to look into it and try it myself. I believe yoga and meditation are incredibly helpful because they have helped me in the past, but it is hard to find the time when life is so busy.
Now, I know that is a poor excuse, and we can do anything we set our minds to. But surprise . . . This is also something I am working on. I'm trying to figure out how to fit yoga, meditation, eating right, blogging and music into my busy schedule. That is all on top of spending time with family and friends. I am stressed just thinking about it.
I know we all feel this way from time to time. It's normal and natural. I have told myself I need to let go of wanting to be perfect and realize that everything is happening in its own divine time. I am growing and learning the lessons I need to learn while I am struggling and stressing out.
Everything takes time. Changing your diet, changing your routine and even healing - emotionally, spiritually and physically. Life is an adventure. We all make mistakes, and we all struggle. The less we try to hide that and just love and support one another the less divided we will feel.
For anyone who is currently struggling, I am here for you. As I've said in the past, I don't have all the answers, and I am still on my path to figure it all out. If there is one thing I have learned from all of this, it would be, don't give up, don't give in and keep fighting for what you want most. You'll get there. We all will.
Hope you all have a great week. I'm always here for you!