You will be reading this on Monday, but right now I’m having a super lazy Sunday! I haven’t been anywhere except in my bed watching Netflix. It is just one of those days where I really need to veg out. I decided to talk about stress eating and food addiction this week. Before I started this blog, I knew that it wasn’t only going to be filled with beautiful recipes and inspirational articles. I wanted this to be a place where you and I can get real with each other and tell it like it is. I wanted/needed a place where we can open up and support each other. I wanted to be able to tell my story in a safe and supportive environment.
I have been on a deep, spiritual journey with myself for past two years. I opened my heart and mind and found yoga which has transformed my life in numerous ways. I went to school to be a holistic health coach and it has helped me transform my diet to eat more clean and vegan. I started surrounding myself with like-minded light workers and came to realize none of us are perfect and we are all on our own path to healing. With all the knowledge I have been given, I still find myself in situations where I stress eat. Realistically I know that I have a food addiction. Food is my drug of choice. For many years I tried to hide behind my kale and green juice and pretend that I didn’t have a problem.
It was only until recently; I decided to get real with myself.
Throughout my life, I have tried weight watchers, calorie counting, and deprivation. They all end with the same result . . . I am hungry, have major cravings and always gain the weight back. This is because diets don’t work. Being addicted to food and being overweight is not about the food on our plates. It’s about the underlying issues we are trying to cover up with food. It’s about the pain we feel from our childhood, the struggles we’re dealing with in our marriage, the loneliness we feel because our kids have moved out and never call. We can’t fix these issues by choosing broccoli over french fries at dinner. The pain will still be there. We have to deal with the pain first. This is something I am working on. I am working on diving really deep within myself and healing from the inside out.
It’s not easy and I am admitting this is something I struggle with on a daily basis. This is only the beginning of my journey, so I do not have all the answers. I want to be able to be around a bowl of candy and not reach for it. I want to be able to eat dinner and stop when I feel content, not when I feel stuffed. I want to be at the point of incredibly hungry and have the power to choose something healthy instead of something fattening. If you are someone that feels like this . . . welcome. It is okay to admit to yourself that you feel this way and you want to change. We all want to feel free from emotional eating. I’m inviting you to go on this journey with me. You’re not broken. You shouldn’t be ashamed. And you’re not alone. Sending love to you all. Talk to you soon.